Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Wow...Who Knew? (Defeated)

I know that it can get tiring...
You're always hearing me talk about this...
I know I'm not the only one that thinks about this constantly, though...
I doubt that I'm the only woman thinking this
all. the. time.
source
I am constantly thinking and worrying.
But it'll be okay.
That's what I always say.
"It's okay."
While mentally I'm thinking,
"I'm sorry I'm a fat ass and that I don't look like I care about myself."
But I do care about myself.
I love myself and want my body to be happy.
That's the problem, actually.
I give my body what it wants.
Whatever it wants.

Want some ice cream, honey?
Here you go.

Want some chocolate-covered pretzels?
Sure, eat the whole bag.

You can't exercise after a half hour of karate?
Go rest, sweetie.

You're on your period?
Aw, you don't have to work out then.  Here's some Doritos for you.

See the vicious cycle?
It's disgusting, isn't it?

So how does it stop?
How do I stop it?

I'm supposed to be a
Speak Now representative,
but I don't even practice what I preach.

Ugh.

null
Jeesh...what a negative nancy, huh?
Interesting what comes out in a post.
Originally I had found that photo on www.weheartit.com and thought,
"Wow.  I could do a whole post on convincing young women that it's not important how fat or skinny you are." Then this happened.
Sorry for the "down on myself"-kind of post.
It happens to the best of us.

10 comments:

rororoyourboat710 said...

I feel the same way...sometimes i just wanna be happy with being fat...but when it's time to go somewhere, and i wanna wear something nice, or even if i just wanna go swimming, i feel like i should be working out...ughhhhh....what do i do? i get depressed and start stalking the pantry.

Kara said...

I'm the same way! I told myself almost a month ago to start working out on a daily basis. SInce then I haven't even been once! I notice more and more every day that I'm not the size that I used to be, but I just don't have the motivation to get up and do anything about it! Good luck!

stuffitellmysister.me said...

Boy does this ever hit home! I drank my Dr. Oz fat flushing water for lunch....followed by potato chips. I don't think that's what he had in mind....and I will ALWAYS be able to pinch more that an inch, I'm afraid... ;)

Mamasita said...

I completely understand!!!
Every day, we make choices, some wise, some not so wise... I just try to keep a level head at the end of the day! And remember that I am a precious vessel that God made, so I need to take care of it - wisely... that means not starving myself!!! But also remembering to take it all in stride... try to be active, and eat healthy portions! (Most days easier said than done!)
:)
Love you Nay!!!
Just the way you ARE!
xo

Kristen Seuberling said...

I think this has to do with reframing self-love. Just like with kids we tell them no because we love them, we gotta tell ourselves no because we love us.

I know this is far easier said than done. I'm no Pollyanna.

I just flat out take the temptations out of the equation. Sorbet lives in my freezer now, not ice cream. If Ammon wants naughty food, he buys it, and keeps it someplace it's convenient for him, but not for me. I want something better for myself, and I don't wanna cave. So I create systems that set me up to succeed every time.

You are fantastic! That's the great thing about making ourselves better: everytime you pick yourself up and start again, you are one step closer to making that long-term change than you were before.

Rainbow Bekah said...

Don't you even worry about feeling like a downer. You are being truthful by posting your feelings and we have ALL gone through that feeling and are still going through it too! I can totally relate!

Anonymous said...

You stop it by finding something you love to do that the general population, for lack of imagination, simply labels, "exercise." It might be karate or kickboxing or yoga... or maybe it's NOT and it's swimming or hiking or dancing... or maybe it's not that either and it's a simple walk around your block with the hubby and your babies a few nights a week after dinner. A good solid bout of laughter burns calories and is a great way to work your abs. A good bear hug to someone you love works your upper back. Pushing your little one on a swing works your arms. 10 minutes of tag with your kids is cardio fun for the whole family. The point is... Once you find that thing, your thing, and you let yourself love and look forward to the experience of this beautiful new thing then... everything will fall into place. Exercise can't be a chore, inspired from a place of anger and self-loathing; it won't make you happy with yourself. But "exercise," as a fun thing you do for yourself or with friends and family, will infuse you with a deeply rooted love for this sweet and brief life. Once that love comes first, love for yourself quickly follows and you'll become more caring and conscious of how you treat your body. And your body will change, but more importantly than that, how you see it will change, too... Know what I mean, jellybean?

Chelsea said...

I totally understand and feel the same way. It's so, so hard not to feel negatively about your appearance... but you always have to remember that you're your own worst critic! We're probably looking through some crazy fun-house mirror when really, we're not some gigantic oddly shaped monster!

Nichole @ Yeung Mother Hubbard said...

Can I copy this post to my blog, please?!?! You are beautiful inside and out and don't you forget it!

We all struggle with this... even the teeny tiney girls... you aren't alone!!

Someone close to me was complaining that they couldn't fit in their 00 jeans anymore... all I could think was "gee, I wish I could fit into any single digit jean size".

Many hugs and much love to you Nay! See you soon!! :)

Earl-Leigh said...

I think the same way too sometimes! Society makes it difficult not to. It took me a long time to realize that my body is meant to look a certain way. I'll never be waif thin and that's okay with me. I just work hard to be the best me possible. That's all we can do. And that's awesome...just like you!